The Happy New Year!

Those bright, brave blue eyes looked down on me and asked me to marry him on the 1st of January 2009 sometime after we rang in the New Year. Sometime after the fireworks above the ocean, different fireworks, even more sublime, went off.
His melifulous voice, his electrical touch and the way he looked on that night, I will never forget.
The sounds of laughter and celebration behind us and the quiet of that porch where we stood alone in a slow dance pose.
A house we never thought would hold such a moment for us.

New Years has always held for me an unachieved expectation, an anticlimax of sorts. All the hype and all the preparations leading to a mediocre night, if not a terrible one, but this year, this year as we kissed and sang and laughed, I realised in that moment how wonderful a night it could be if you’re exactly where you want to be.
And it became... Special. Special is not quite the word, but it’s the only one that springs to mind. Special does not do it any kind of justice.

My mind is awash with thoughts of that night as I sit here at my desk and ponder my reality.
If you asked me a year ago where I thought I would be now, I would never have fantasized so wildly, as is my life right now.

I could wax poetically for a thousand lifetimes about Emil and all the love he enriches my life with on an hourly basis but I find I have to hold myself back a bit so as not to induce gag reflexes in whoever reads my words. I realise mushy isn’t popular but I write as I feel and all I feel right now is love.